Rip Van Winkle
HeardyoumissedmeI'mback.
When the new television season started, I was really hoping that I would find a new show (or two, or ten) to watch, since I am down to The Amazing Race, Lost, and Project Runway which is about to end. Although I’m a college graduate, somehow the TV listings remain a mystery to me. I can never remember what is on when, or what that new show I wanted to watch is called. Usually, I depend on commercials to remind me when something is coming on, but the less TV I watch, the fewer commercials I see, and the vicious cycle continues. So instead of trying to decipher the TV guide, each night I spend a while surfing through the networks, trying to see if anything I’ve read about or anything remotely interesting is on. However, my remote seems to change not only the TV channel, but whole parts of the space/time continuum. Don’t believe me? Consider this:
In 1992, when I was young and single, the movie Singles came out. I was moderately obsessed with that movie even though I found most of the people in it rather irritating. The main characters, Kyra Sedgwick and Campbell Scott bothered me the most, so I’m not sure why I kept watching it over and over and over again. But I am not bringing up the movie to review it or to explore my need to watch it repeatedly.
At the end of the movie, Campbell Scott has quit his job (or been fired, even with the many many times I watched it, I’m not really sure what happened) and he holes up in his apartment. Later, when a neighbor comes by to check on him, it is clear he hasn’t showered or cleaned a dish or moved off the sofa for weeks. He even remarks that it is possible to live in society and never leave the house. A few days or whatever after that, Kyra Sedgwick comes by to get back together with him, and at the end of the movie Matt Dillon says that the two of them are moving in together. Happy ending, la la la.
But the other day, I was flipping through the channels and stopped for a moment on a show called “Six Degrees.” Why did I stop? Did I remember a good review I had read? Was there some engaging dialogue or heart-stopping action taking place? No. What I saw was a grey-haired Campbell Scott getting up from his sofa in a filthy apartment, a place that has all the hallmarks of a holing up hole. There was a little montage showing him clean up the place and shower and shave and then go somewhere for a job interview. The job interview back story referred to his breakdown or whatever. The details of the show escape me, because all I could think was, “What happened to Kyra Sedgwick? I thought you guys were moving in together and here you’ve spent the last fourteen years going grey on your couch.”
I still can’t separate the two images in my mind. Does Campbell Scott have some sort of contract requirement where all star vehicles must include a scene on a couch in a dirty apartment? Where are those fourteen years of Campbell Scott’s and his characters’ lives? When I looked up the show to see what it’s about, Campbell Scott’s character is described as “a divorced father that was believed by many to be dead.” So maybe the hoisting up from the dirty couch – the last place he was seen by a large audience, is a sort of resurrection of sorts for Campbell Scott’s career, which was believed by many to be dead.
Another example:
Tonight when I sat down to channel surf, I flicked right past the Inspiration Channel or whatever it’s called, but then I had to go back and reread the caption under the badly dressed, over-makeupated, screechy preacher lady. It said “Activate your miracle by going to the phone right now!!” Then it changed to “Your donation is God’s authorization to perform miracles in your life.” Then it changed to “Sow your financial seed and reap God’s blessings.”
Did I miss something? I thought the shifty televangelists stealing money had disappeared or at least gone underground during the Jim Bakker/Jimmy Swaggert fiascos. But then I started to worry. What’s my miracle? When did God start asking for authorization and why haven’t I provided it? Why didn’t anyone tell me to sow my financial seed so that I could reap God’s blessings? Is this why my life feels so stressful? I should be watching more TV so I won’t miss out on these investment opportunities.
But today I saw things on TV that make me realize that time has moved on. I got to see holy roller Christian conservative congressmen, once woozy with shock upon hearing that Bill Clinton had cheated on his wife with a grown woman, rather nonchalantly dismissing concerns that that one of their own had propositioned teenage boys. So gay marriage is really really bad, but gay pedophiles are okay, as long as they are Republican? Just because he didn’t get a chance to lay his hands on any of these kids, he’s not a pedophile? Apparently everything can be forgiven and blown off in the name of reelection. I never understood when I heard that countries had dissolved their parliaments, but now I can appreciate how that would be a very appealing idea.
PS. When I did a Google search of Hastert to check what state he was from, the results produced all of these links:
Speaker of the House
Protecting our children from Internet predators and child exploitation ... House Speaker Dennis Hastert (R-IL) today made the following statement after ...
speaker.house.gov/ - 22k - Cached - Similar pages
Rep. J. Dennis Hastert, 14th District of Illinois
addressing Internet safety. ST. CHARLES – Congressman J. Dennis Hastert ... and throughout the nation have highlighted the danger of Internet predators. ...
www.house.gov/list/press/il14_hastert/8_29_06_Internetsafety.html - 9k - Cached - Similar pages
Rep. J. Dennis Hastert, 14th District of Illinois
address Internet safety. BATAVIA - Congressman J. Dennis Hastert on Tuesday ... and throughout the nation have highlighted the danger of Internet predators. ...
www.house.gov/apps/list/press/il14_hastert/8_22_06_kidsInternet.html - 6k -
They’ve all been removed from Hastert’s web pages. I wonder why.
When the new television season started, I was really hoping that I would find a new show (or two, or ten) to watch, since I am down to The Amazing Race, Lost, and Project Runway which is about to end. Although I’m a college graduate, somehow the TV listings remain a mystery to me. I can never remember what is on when, or what that new show I wanted to watch is called. Usually, I depend on commercials to remind me when something is coming on, but the less TV I watch, the fewer commercials I see, and the vicious cycle continues. So instead of trying to decipher the TV guide, each night I spend a while surfing through the networks, trying to see if anything I’ve read about or anything remotely interesting is on. However, my remote seems to change not only the TV channel, but whole parts of the space/time continuum. Don’t believe me? Consider this:
In 1992, when I was young and single, the movie Singles came out. I was moderately obsessed with that movie even though I found most of the people in it rather irritating. The main characters, Kyra Sedgwick and Campbell Scott bothered me the most, so I’m not sure why I kept watching it over and over and over again. But I am not bringing up the movie to review it or to explore my need to watch it repeatedly.
At the end of the movie, Campbell Scott has quit his job (or been fired, even with the many many times I watched it, I’m not really sure what happened) and he holes up in his apartment. Later, when a neighbor comes by to check on him, it is clear he hasn’t showered or cleaned a dish or moved off the sofa for weeks. He even remarks that it is possible to live in society and never leave the house. A few days or whatever after that, Kyra Sedgwick comes by to get back together with him, and at the end of the movie Matt Dillon says that the two of them are moving in together. Happy ending, la la la.
But the other day, I was flipping through the channels and stopped for a moment on a show called “Six Degrees.” Why did I stop? Did I remember a good review I had read? Was there some engaging dialogue or heart-stopping action taking place? No. What I saw was a grey-haired Campbell Scott getting up from his sofa in a filthy apartment, a place that has all the hallmarks of a holing up hole. There was a little montage showing him clean up the place and shower and shave and then go somewhere for a job interview. The job interview back story referred to his breakdown or whatever. The details of the show escape me, because all I could think was, “What happened to Kyra Sedgwick? I thought you guys were moving in together and here you’ve spent the last fourteen years going grey on your couch.”
I still can’t separate the two images in my mind. Does Campbell Scott have some sort of contract requirement where all star vehicles must include a scene on a couch in a dirty apartment? Where are those fourteen years of Campbell Scott’s and his characters’ lives? When I looked up the show to see what it’s about, Campbell Scott’s character is described as “a divorced father that was believed by many to be dead.” So maybe the hoisting up from the dirty couch – the last place he was seen by a large audience, is a sort of resurrection of sorts for Campbell Scott’s career, which was believed by many to be dead.
Another example:
Tonight when I sat down to channel surf, I flicked right past the Inspiration Channel or whatever it’s called, but then I had to go back and reread the caption under the badly dressed, over-makeupated, screechy preacher lady. It said “Activate your miracle by going to the phone right now!!” Then it changed to “Your donation is God’s authorization to perform miracles in your life.” Then it changed to “Sow your financial seed and reap God’s blessings.”
Did I miss something? I thought the shifty televangelists stealing money had disappeared or at least gone underground during the Jim Bakker/Jimmy Swaggert fiascos. But then I started to worry. What’s my miracle? When did God start asking for authorization and why haven’t I provided it? Why didn’t anyone tell me to sow my financial seed so that I could reap God’s blessings? Is this why my life feels so stressful? I should be watching more TV so I won’t miss out on these investment opportunities.
But today I saw things on TV that make me realize that time has moved on. I got to see holy roller Christian conservative congressmen, once woozy with shock upon hearing that Bill Clinton had cheated on his wife with a grown woman, rather nonchalantly dismissing concerns that that one of their own had propositioned teenage boys. So gay marriage is really really bad, but gay pedophiles are okay, as long as they are Republican? Just because he didn’t get a chance to lay his hands on any of these kids, he’s not a pedophile? Apparently everything can be forgiven and blown off in the name of reelection. I never understood when I heard that countries had dissolved their parliaments, but now I can appreciate how that would be a very appealing idea.
PS. When I did a Google search of Hastert to check what state he was from, the results produced all of these links:
Speaker of the House
Protecting our children from Internet predators and child exploitation ... House Speaker Dennis Hastert (R-IL) today made the following statement after ...
speaker.house.gov/ - 22k - Cached - Similar pages
Rep. J. Dennis Hastert, 14th District of Illinois
addressing Internet safety. ST. CHARLES – Congressman J. Dennis Hastert ... and throughout the nation have highlighted the danger of Internet predators. ...
www.house.gov/list/press/il14_hastert/8_29_06_Internetsafety.html - 9k - Cached - Similar pages
Rep. J. Dennis Hastert, 14th District of Illinois
address Internet safety. BATAVIA - Congressman J. Dennis Hastert on Tuesday ... and throughout the nation have highlighted the danger of Internet predators. ...
www.house.gov/apps/list/press/il14_hastert/8_22_06_kidsInternet.html - 6k -
They’ve all been removed from Hastert’s web pages. I wonder why.
posted by Shannon at 11:16 PM
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